Day 60: Truth: Anger is Part of Grief Anger shows up as a wise adaptation to loss. It is a fierce protector. It is active when all else feels so passive. It pulses in the body and reminds us we are living. It allows us to speak when words are not otherwise available. Anger likes to protect what is most raw. And anger knows there is love or connection or an unfulfilled hope or vision that is no longer. Anger is a sign that we have loved. And hoped. And dreamed. It is a s

Day 56: Grief Mystery I still find grief mysterious. One mystery I think about all the time is how grief can shatter us, and despite that, we retain some ability to function. One client of mine put it best—"grief is maddening. Why is it that I can still do a few things? I feel as though it should have already killed me.” It wasn’t until I was immersed in grief work that I became in awe of parts of humanity. Sure. Definitely not all the time. We can have awful and violen

Day 53: Grief Balm And then there come those moments that offer some balm for grief. Grief balm comes in many forms (and yes, can be maddeningly inaccessible in the first phase of acute grief). When these moments of balm arrive, notice them. Bathe in them. Yesterday, my grief balm came in the form of “Let go, mama.” AND let me be very clear--grief balm doesn’t take away the grief. It doesn’t block it. It eases it. And sometimes, these moments are confusingly both amazing AND