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"I Cannot Imagine..."


Day 29: I cannot imagine…


When people say “I cannot imagine,” they are actually imagining. They are actually going there—tapping into the innate human empathy center that allows each one of us to connect to another’s pain.


And then, most people notice how painful that is to do and stop themselves from going further. And that’s ok. And that’s human too. However, it’s gotten all too normalized to stop ourselves, to not sit longer in witnessing someone’s deep pain. It’s become normalized that only grief counselors and therapists do this. But it’s not true. We all have the capacity to be with deep pain. We just have unlearned it over the centuries as death and dying transitioned from homes to hospitals, as grieving became more silent, and as rituals for grief and loss fell out of community circles and into the isolation of our homes.



Welcome to my second, 100-day project. I hope to provide a daily offering on something grief-related. I am a grief therapist and educator working with people in Oregon, Washington, DC, Maryland, and Maine. This feed is in honor of each person who has trusted me with their stories and wisdom during their grief journey. I hope that others may benefit from simple and straightforward talk about a topic that can be difficult.

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