The Unknown Evolves
Day 30: In grief, the unknown evolves
Living during a pandemic has highlighted for me how much we humans don’t know, and how we have been stretched to sit in the unknown—and how what we don’t know seems to evolve. The unknown is already one of the most challenging parts of a grief process, coming up often in circular thought patterns such as, “what will the future be like without my person, if this could happen, then what other terrible things might shift in my life, and even, will I ever be able to expect something or hope for something out of my life again?” Grief breaks open any former thoughts of having agency or control over swaths of our lives. Sitting in the unknown is uncomfortable and not how most of my clients wish to spend their time when they already feel like they’ve had so little say in what has just happened in their lives.
What I have found is both maddening and hopeful--in grief, what is unknown and how we sit in this unknown will evolve and change. I never know exactly how this will evolve for any individual, yet I do know that people who allow themselves to grieve have more resilience when it comes to living in the space of unknown. Sitting in the unknown, whether we like it or not, is a human experience, just as grief is a human experience. Grief is the mechanism that allows the unknown to be a little more tolerable, a little more habitable.
Welcome to my #100dayproject. I am providing a daily offering on #grief, in honor of each person who has trusted me with their story and wisdom during their #griefjourney. I hope that others may benefit from simple and straightforward talk about a topic that can be difficult. Thanks for following and/or sharing.