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Grief is a Crisis of Trust


Day 28: Grief and Trust


In the book, About Grief, Ron Marasco and Brian Shuff, call out grief as “largely a crisis of trust.” This has always stuck with me as such truth.


In the initial phase of grief, we are relearning our world, and a big part of this includes relearning what “trust” means to us. On a daily basis, most of us have some sense of trust in something—whether that is waking up, having our people nearby, a sense of something larger than ourselves, our own ability to move our bodies, or believing that the people we love will be accessible. When someone we love dies, or our life changes in another unfixable way, our system tells us that we cannot trust much. And most of us begin to reevaluate who and what we can trust, which can leave us feeling unmoored, unsteady, and without any solid way of being in the world.


Part of figuring out how to rebuild some sense of trust outside of ourselves again means offering ourselves some grace and time for the lack of security many feel during acute grief.


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