Grief Changes Us
Day 61: Grief Changes Us
Megan O’Rourke wrote ‘The Long Goodbye’ which tells the story of the loss of her mom. As a poet, she accesses words and phrases and descriptions that have always stuck with me.
Grief will change us. We hear that all the time. But how it will change us and to what extent is as variable as we are.
Each of my clients grieve parts of themselves that they got to be before the loss, even if they also feel that they are growing into fuller, more honest version of themselves. They are grieving the carefree approach to life, or not having to be constantly aware of what could happen at any moment, and even the part of them that used to believe there is a reason for everything. They grieve the freedom they once had to watch any tv show, or travel without thinking through worst case scenarios, or the version of them that didn’t contain the sadness that they feel on a daily basis.
Grief is a relational journey. We grieve the relationship with the person that used to be physically present and are challenged to reformulate what a relationship with the deceased means now. We also are in relationship to ourselves—and in grief, we are forced to reflect on our former selves and miss certain parts of what used to be able to exist in us.
Welcome to my #100dayproject. I am providing a daily offering on #grief, in honor of each person who has trusted me with their story and wisdom during their #griefjourney. I hope that others may benefit from simple and straightforward talk about a topic that can be difficult. Thanks for following and/or sharing.